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美国留学:Argumentative Essay该怎么写?

Dueduedue官方博客2017-09-27essay代写 762 0A+A-

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Argumentative Essay真的很难写,可是我们都能解决,下面是一篇范文,有时候不管是写文章还是做机构,生气没有用啊!

本文是一篇「示威是否有暴力问题」的范文,另加写议论文的三项辅助方法,因为超过了一篇博的篇幅,只好分上、分两篇,上篇是范文的正文及注释。下篇包括范文的正文,但没有注释,还包括写好argumentative essay的三个方法。

(1)如何用modal (auxiliary) verbs调整语气(调整说得太直、太死的话);

(2)如何用-ly adverbs调整语气(调整说得太直、太死的话);

(3)如何用-ly adverbs加强语气(和(1)、(2)相反)。

这是上篇。

范文的题目。

Seeing the rise in protesting activities in Hong Kong, some people are worried that Hong Kong may become a violent city, while others are supportive of the protestors. Write a letter to the Young Post stating your views on the issue. Sign your name 'Chris Wong'

审题:这条题目的重点只有一个字violent/violence。考生可以兼写正、反意见,也可以只写正方或只写反方意见,题目没有特定的要求。

这题目可以有两种写法。亲建制的朋友可以写「香港是法治社会,任何人不得违法…擅自坐到马路上或闯进场馆就是违法…暴力就是违法…影响安宁…影响安定繁荣…因此影响到每个人」等等。相信也可以取得很好成绩,完全没有问题。

不过,个人觉得,以上的论述稍嫌片面,只谈现象,没有探讨现象背后的原因,就好像说:

「上课就应听讲,不得在课堂上做听讲以外的任何事情,这叫课堂秩序,不得违反,人人违反课堂秩序,学校制度就会崩溃…」

但是,请问,为什么学生会在课室看另一本书、做另一课的功课、谈话、冥想、魂游、打机或者做其他事情?可能因为学生本身无心向学,也可能因为学生发生了一些个人问题,也可能因为老师每堂都讲得不知所谓,学生受不了!

关于示威和所谓暴力,我的写法是:

「只责怪示威者是片面的,其一。示威只是现象,现象背后的原因是政府施政失当,其二。若有人假示威之名犯罪(例如一边示威一边走进百佳超市抢掠)当然应该惩罚,其三。但示威时的一些混乱和推撞在所难免,全世界都如此,香港人已经是全世界最和平的示威者,其四。解决社会冲突的方法不是镇压,而是由政府去调整政策,其五。」

文中的modal verbs用了红色粗体,用来调整语气的-ly adverbs用了蓝色,都和写好议论文的三种方法有关,会在下篇的文后较详细地谈。

视乎题目,例如题目特别要求谈论科学馆的事,开头可以这样写。不过,试题多数不会要你写个别事件(isolated incident)。

Dear Editor:

I am writing to state my views on the scuffles1 at the Science Museum2 during the consultation forums3 on September 1 on the government’s plan to scrap Legislative Council by-elections4.

Some social sectors4a condemn the protestors for forcing open the doors5 of the venue and leading to the scuffles. They consider the incident a sign warning of a possible deterioration of Hong Kong into a violent city. (或者They warn of a possible deterioration6 of Hong Kong into a city of violence.)

  1. scuffles 推撞。

  2. the Science Museum 科学馆。

  3. consultation forum咨询会。

  4. scrap Legislative Council by-elections 废除立法会补选。

  5. a some social sectors一些社会界别/团体

  6. condemn the protestors for forcing open the doors 谴责示威者强行开门,结构是condemn somebody for doing something。

  7. deterioration 退化。

如果试题围绕「和平」与「暴力」,可以这样写:

Dear Editor,

I am writing to state my views on the increasing acts of protests by political parties and grass-roots organizations in Hong Kong, which are considered / alleged as7 violent by some social sectors.

The pro-establishment camp8 condemns the activists for staging sits-in8a, trying to pulling down security barricades8b and scuffling with the police. They consider such acts to be signs warning of a possible deterioration of Hong Kong into a violent city. (或者They warn of a possible deterioration of Hong Kong into a city of violence.)

7,Active voice是consider A as B;Passive voice 是A was considered as B。

8,pro-establishment camp 亲建制派

8a,condemns the activists for staging sits-in的结构是condemn somebody for doing something。

8b,try to pull down security barricades 拉铁马

Personally9, I don't think Hong Kong has got to that stage. Putting all the blame on protestors is rather one-sided10. Demonstration is generally11 a manifestation of social grievance12, and we should explore the causes behind13. Some questions can help our understanding of the issue14(或Some questions may help us understand the issue.). Why hasn't the government had sufficient consultation with us before deciding on its policy? What makes people who are otherwise placid take to the streets?15 Is there any abuse of police power16? Do the police use pepper spray arbitrarily? Isn't it an insult to peaceful protestors to handcuff them?18

  1. Personally个人认为。另外,personally也可解作「亲自」。

  2. one-sided 只看见问题的一面;片面的。

  3. generally 通常。

  4. a manifestation of social grievance 社会不满情绪的呈现,结构是A of B。

  5. explore the causes behind 求索背后的原因,结构是Verb + object + adverb (VOA)。

  6. issue 问题;议题。

  7. What makes people who are otherwise placid take to the streets? 什么导致本来和平的人上街? (什么导致在其他情况下和平的人上街?)placid 和本段最尾的peaceful是同义词,这样写是用「换字法」。好过前面又写peaceful后面又写peaceful。

  8. abuse of police power滥用警权。

  9. arbitrarily 任意地;武断地。

  10. 这段先说「个人认为香港没有变成暴力城市,接着说只怪责示威者是片面的,因为示威是社会不满情绪的呈现,」然后用Some questions can help our understanding of the issue带出几个问题。这些问题本身就包含了答案。如果要论述政府如何不对,要讲到天光,问几条有力的问题是最简单、易写的作文方法。所以,各位,请温习问句的结构。

Opinion surveys19 have shown that the approval rate for the government has kept falling / has reached an all-time nadir of [․ ]%20, attributable21 to a number of government policies which have fuelled social inequality22 and triggered mounting social discontent23. Indeed, we cannot help questioning24 whether the government has done its best to be as equitable and reasonable as it is supposed to be25.

  1. opinion surveys 民意调查,这里用众数,含糊其词,没有指明是哪几个调查。谁人在试场还会记得这些?

  2. 在试场,多数会写have kept falling,几项调查显示政府民望一直下跌,这样写也符合事实。 Have kept falling的结构是verb + -ing form。

  3. attributable 可归因于。这个字很常用。我这句的灵感来自我听到的新闻报道,民意调查后,例如港大等调查机构会尝试解析调查结果。

  4. fuelled social inequality 加剧社会的不公平,结构是verb + adjective + noun,问题在于你懂不懂用fuel这个动词。你现在懂了,写下它,作文时可能有用。

  5. triggered mounting social discontent,触发日益增加的社会不满情绪,结构是verb + adj + adj + noun。 Mounting 是increasing的同义词→记得换字法吗?

  6. we cannot help questioning 或one cannot help questioning 均可,指我们不禁要问,结构是cannot help + -ing,是个惯用结构。

  7. whether the government has done its best to be as equitable and reasonable as it is supposed to be 政府有否竭尽所能做到它应该做到(市民期望它做到)的公平和合理

There's no denying26 that some citizens are dissatisfied and want their voices to be heard. Unquestionably, they are angry about the government's lack of long-term plans, incompetence in dealing with the widening wealth gap27, and attempts to scrap Legislative Council by-elections / attempts to reverse Hong Kong's nascent democracy28 / reluctance to promote genuine universal suffrage29.

  1. there’s no denying 无可否认。

  2. incompetence in dealing with the widening wealth gap 无力处理正在加剧的贫富悬殊,结构是incompetence in doing something。

  3. attempts to reverse Hong Kong’s nascent democracy 尝试给香港初生的民主开倒车。 Hong Kong’s nascent democracy的结构是 「’s」+ adj + noun。

  4. reluctance to promote genuine universal suffrage 推动真普选时裹足不前/不情不愿。

One could say that people take to the streets30 because they are dissatisfied. They evidently want their voices to be heard. Their dissatisfaction may have culminated into a variety of behavioural reactions. They stage street protests31 and sit-ins32 in an attempt to arouse the attention of society33. They want to make the government feel the pressure34 and alert the government to their problems35. And they do not mean to harm anyone36. (或Thus, one may conclude that they do not mean to harm anyone.)

  1. take to the streets 上街。

  2. stage street protests 发动街头抗议,protests前面或许写过了,这次写street protests,又是换字法。

  3. sit-ins 静坐。

  4. arouse the attention of society 唤起社会注意。请留意,society 泛指社会时不用the。在本文,如society 之前用the,变成了唤起「那个」社会的注意,不通的。总之,society不要随便用the。如你作文时不肯定须否用the,教你一个方法,写our society,例如这里,变成吸引「我们」社会的注意,通的。

  5. make the government feel the pressure令政府感受到压力,结构是make + object + infinitive without to + object of infinitive。

  6. alert the government to their problems令政府注意他们的问题,alert A to B。

  7. And they do not mean to harm anyone. 他们无意伤害任何人。这段说了几行,就是想说这句,请注意,我写的时候,这句本来放在中间,重看时发觉放在最尾好一些。

Unruly elements37 who commit crimes in the name of protests38 should, of course, be punished by law. That said39, we should admit that Hong Kong people may be the most peaceful in parading40 and that some chaotic scenes41 and minor scuffles42 are common in protesting activities all over the world. The government should not be afraid of such acts; the police should not try to suppress them. Suppression and attempts to enlarge upon/to amplify the alleged “violence” of Hongkongers who try to voice their views43 will inevitably further alienate44 them. Instead, the Chief Executive and all Bureau heads45 should humbly46 listen and respond to47 their requests.47

  1. unruly elements不法份子。

  2. commit crimes in the name of protests 假示威之名犯罪。

  3. That said 解「虽然如此」,用来转话锋,即「说了以上那些话之后,我们还要考虑以下的什么什么」,然后就开始说另一个不同或相反的观点。 That said和Having said that同义。

  4. parading游行。 Protest用多了,改用parading,是换字法。

  5. chaotic scenes 混乱场面。

  6. minor scuffles 小推撞。

  7. enlarge upon/amplify the alleged “violence” of Hongkongers who try to voice their views放大他们所说的、想表达意见的香港人的「暴力」。

  8. alienate 令人离心。 Alienate Mr. A 令Mr. A 离心/失去Mr. A 的支持。

  9. Bureau heads政策局局长。

  10. humbly 虚心地。

  11. respond to回应。

  12. 又是换字法,前面用了views,这里改用requests。

To seek fundamental solutions to our social conflicts, we definitely need a re-think on48 the acts and feelings of the people! I genuinely believe that, by doing things differently, not only can the government improve its image substantially and win significant support, but it can also bring us a fairer society49.  We certainly need a government with the right values50.Chris Wong

  1. a re-think on something 重新思考某事。

  2. 这是倒装结构→Not only can Mr. A do B, but Mr. A can also do C。请留意,这样写的时候,B和C一般是性质不很相同的两件事。如果你想说的是Mr. A 能吃又能喝,就最好不要用这结构。如果你想说Mr. A能办妥他的专业工作又能参于街头抗争,可以考虑用以上结构。

  3. right values 正确的价值观。

接下来是下篇:

范文的题目:

Seeing the rise in protesting activities in Hong Kong, some people are worried that Hong Kong may become a violent city, while others are supportive of the protestors. Write a letter to the Young Post stating your views on the issue. Sign your name 'Chris Wong'

范文的正文:

文中的modal verbs用了红色粗体,用来调整语气的-ly adverbs用了蓝色,都和写好议论文的三种方法有关,会在文后较详细地谈。

视乎题目,例如题目特别要求谈论科学馆的事,开头可以这样写。不过,试题多数不会要你写个别事件(isolated incident)。

Dear Editor,

I am writing to state my views on the scuffles1 at the Science Museum2 during the consultation forums3 on September 1 on the government’s plan to scrap Legislative Council by-elections4.

Some social sectors4a condemn the protestors for forcing open the doors5 of the venue and leading to the scuffles. They consider the incident a sign warning of a possible deterioration of Hong Kong into a violent city. (或者They warn of a possible deterioration6 of Hong Kong into a city of violence.)

如果试题围绕「和平」与「暴力」,可以这样写:

Dear Editor,

I am writing to state my views on the increasing acts of protests by political parties and grass-roots organizations in Hong Kong, which are considered / alleged as7 violent by some social sectors.

The pro-establishment camp8 condemns the activists for staging sits-in8a, trying to pulling down security barricades8b and scuffling with the police. They consider such acts to be signs warning of a possible deterioration of Hong Kong into a violent city. (或者They warn of a possible deterioration of Hong Kong into a city of violence.)

Personally9, I don't think Hong Kong has got to that stage. Putting all the blame on protestors is rather one-sided10. Demonstration is generally11 a manifestation of social grievance12, and we should explore the causes behind13. Some questions can help our understanding of the issue14(或Some questions may help us understand the issue.). Why hasn't the government had sufficient consultation with us before deciding on its policy? What makes people who are otherwise placid take to the streets?15 Is there any abuse of police power16? Do the police use pepper spray arbitrarily? Isn't it an insult to peaceful protestors to handcuff them?18

Opinion surveys19 have shown that the approval rate for the government has kept falling / has reached an all-time nadir of [․ ]%20, attributable21 to a number of government policies which have fuelled social inequality22 and triggered mounting social discontent23. Indeed, we cannot help questioning24 whether the government has done its best to be as equitable and reasonable as it is supposed to be25.

There's no denying26 that some citizens are dissatisfied and want their voices to be heard. Unquestionably, they are angry about the government's lack of long-term plans, incompetence in dealing with the widening wealth gap27, and attempts to scrap Legislative Council by-elections / attempts to reverse Hong Kong's nascent democracy28 / reluctance to promote genuine universal suffrage29.

One could say that people take to the streets30 because they are dissatisfied. They evidently want their voices to be heard. Their dissatisfaction may have culminated into a variety of behavioural reactions. They stage street protests31 and sit-ins32 in an attempt to arouse the attention of society33. They want to make the government feel the pressure34 and alert the government to their problems35. And they do not mean to harm anyone36. (或Thus, one may conclude that they do not mean to harm anyone.)

Unruly elements37 who commit crimes in the name of protests38 should, of course, be punished by law. That said39, we should admit that Hong Kong people may be the most peaceful in parading40 and that some chaotic scenes41 and minor scuffles42 are common in protesting activities all over the world. The government should not be afraid of such acts; the police should not try to suppress them. Suppression and attempts to enlarge upon/to amplify the alleged “violence” of Hongkongers who try to voice their views43 will inevitably further alienate44 them. Instead, the Chief Executive and all Bureau heads45 should humbly46 listen and respond to47 their requests.47

To seek fundamental solutions to our social conflicts, we definitely need a re-think on48 the acts and feelings of the people! I genuinely believe that, by doing things differently, not only can the government improve its image substantially and win significant support, but it can also bring us a fairer society49.  We certainly need a government with the right values50.

Chris Wong

第二部分:写好argumentative essays的三种辅助方法

以下要谈帮助我们写好argumentative essay的三种辅助方法。第一种方法是用modal (auxiliary) word调整语气→话到口边留半句!

请先比较这两句:

1. Soaring rents in Hong Kong bring pressure on certain commercial sectors. (如果你这样写,你的意思是现在已经带来压力(bring pressure on)。)

2. Soaring rents in Hong Kong will bring pressure on certain commercial sectors. (如果你这样写,你的意思是将会带来压力(bring pressure on)。)

●问:为何第2句要用will?

●答:We often need to make predictions or judgments in writing argumentative essays。写议论文(或写议论句)时,往往要提出前瞻(其实是你自己的判断),但我们不会每次都说I opine that / In my view / I think that,有时我们会将自己的想法用modal expressions 表达(Model expressions 指will、must、might、can、could、would、should、ought to等),上文第2句用will,其实不是真的说「会」发生,而是用will来表示你想表达你「确信将会导致」发生。

●再看看以下几句。

3. Soaring rents in Hong Kong will bring pressure on certain commercial sectors.(你在判断,你在说你「确信将会带来压力」。)

4. Soaring rents in Hong Kong, then, will bring pressure on certain commercial sectors.(then写不写也可以)

5. Soaring rents in Hong Kong would bring pressure on certain commercial sectors. (你在说「将会带来压力」。)

6. Soaring rents in Hong Kong may bring pressure on certain commercial sectors. (你在说「可能带来压力」。)

7. Soaring rents in Hong Kong can bring pressure on certain commercial sectors. (你在说「可以带来压力」。)

8. Soaring rents in Hong Kong could bring pressure on certain commercial sectors. (你在说「也许可以带来压力」(弱)。)

9. Soaring rents in Hong Kong might bring pressure on certain commercial sectors. (你在说「也许可能带来压力」(弱)。)

10. A consequence of soaring rents in Hong Kong should be increasing pressure on certain commercial sectors. (你在说「一个结果应该是带来压力」。)

以上的写法叫hedging(略作抵消的写法/话到口边留半句),例如,你只是说might/could bring pressure on,没有将立场说得太死, 你的argument较难露出破绽,显得更合理、更入耳。

第二种方法是用-ly adverbs调整语气和稍作保留→也是话到口边留半句!

稍作保留语气的adverbs:

Apparently(apparently 的意思常令人混淆,它有时解作「显然」(很肯定似的),但更多情况下解作「从表面上看」。所以,如果你说Apparently it's going to rain。其实你不是很肯定会going to rain,你只是从你所见的情况判断会going to rain。) / arguably(这个字解作「有理由论证说」,不解作「可以争论」) / broadly / evidently / frequently / generally / genuinely / justifiably / likely / normally / partially / personally /possibly /probably / roughly / seemingly / surely / typically / usually

一些prepositional phrases 和其他expressions也能为语气作保留:

As a (general) rule / broadly speaking / generally speaking / in a sense / in a way / in most cases / in the majority of cases / in principle / in some senses / in some respects / in many respects / more or less / roughly speaking

另外,明明是你自己的话,你可以不用I + active voice,而代之以It 结构,例:I think that freedom of expression is an essential element of modern society 改为It is claimed that / It is said that freedom of expression is an essential element of modern society.

类似的expressions 还有it is (widely) accepted / it is believed / it is said / it has been said / it is generally agreed / it is claimed / it has been claimed / it is suggested / it has been suggested / it is tacitly assumed。

还可以用subject + be + past participle + to的结构,例如:你可以不写I believe that prostitution has existed since ancient times,而写Prostitution is believed to have existed since ancient times. 你又可以不写In my view , corruption is a major obstacle to reform,而写Corruption is said to be a major obstacle to reform.

这些结构包括:be believed to / be claimed to / be considered to / be found to / be said to / be seen to / be shown to / be thought to

第三种方法是用-ly adverbs调整语气,但不是稍作保留,而是加强肯定,但你用的时候,首先要肯定你的话的确没有破绽,例如是一些很「大路」的话,像:Obviously , we should not condone any disruption to law and order(我们明显不应容忍破坏治安的行为。). 或者Unquestionably, we should not tolerate any collusion between officials and businessmen(无庸置疑,我们不应容忍官商勾结。)。

加强肯定语气的adverbs:

Categorically(断然地)/ certainly / clearly / definitely / emphatically / indisputably / inevitably / irrefutably (令人无法反驳地)/ observably / obviously / plainly / undeniably / undoubtedly / unquestionably

要加强语气,还可有这些expressions:

for sure / for certain

it is /was clear/obvious/indisputable/undeniable that

there is/was no doubt that

without doubt

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